oh how I miss you…..

….sleep! I miss you so, so, so much! I can not even remember what it is like to sleep more than 4 hours at a time (and that is a good block, most are a lot shorter!). I think we are going on a full year of sleepless nights. Before Jack was born it was that big ol’ belly that just stopped me from sleeping, that and Jack feeling like he must sleep on my bladder! Since Jack came along… that boy just can not figure out how to sleep all the way through the night! Both of my children are now currently sleeping, so I think I will try to go to bed also. I just wanted to publicly say how much I miss sleep. I can not wait for the day that I can sleep a whole night through again!

Published in: on January 31, 2011 at 8:08 pm  Leave a Comment  

life’s amazing twists….

I am not sure that the title to this post is really the right one. I just do not know what else to call it. I am just sitting here today and thinking about all the friends I had in high school. It has been a long time since we were there, lol, and a lot of the memories are starting to get a little on the fuzzy side. Right after high school I left, I moved to California and got married. Then after that I moved to Pennsylvania where I lived for 6 years. During that time I really did not keep in touch with anyone and when I came home to visit I mostly just hung out with my family. Then came divorce and the move back to Arizona. Some of my friends I reconnected with then, some I had no idea where they had moved on to. Fast forward like 4 years, along comes Facebook. I decided to join Facebook because my mom could not quit talking about it, lol. Then once I was on there I realized how many people were also on there. It became like a high school reunion after that! It was so easy to find all of these people and to reconnect. I will admit, I have changed with time and age and some others have to and things are not quite the same. The others… well when we grew up it seems that we learned more about each other and I don’t want to say became more alike, but the differences is what makes us such a great group now. There may be many miles between us, it may have been many years since we have seen each other, but they are my support group. They have been here to talk to me when my mom died, when Branden left, during the pregnancy that I was alone for most of and my big move to Germany. They remind me to take a breath and to stand up and be strong. They sometimes just simply say that they are here for me if I ever need to talk and that is exactly what I need. As you grow up and make new friends it is never quite the same. I have met some great people since high school, people I am sure I will keep in my life forever. It just isn’t the same though to have that friend that you can say…”hey remember back in the day….”. That friend that can remember what your hair looked like your freshman year and has the yearbook picture to remind you! The friends that will make a shutterfly page with pictures from back in junior high and high school! Those friends who remember who your ‘first love’ was and were there when your heart got broken. I can not wait to see these girls again, even though it may be many years. I know a few of them will read this and they know who they are… I just want to let you girls know…. I am so grateful we found each other! I love being a part of your life and having you be a part of mine! I love being able to watch our kids all grow up, even if it is just through posts and pictures on facebook. Without you girls …. these last few years would have been very hard. I want to thank you all for being there for me! And I want you all to know that I am here for you always. I may be in another country… but I am always available on the computer and I can always call you all. Anytime you all need me…. I will do anything that I can for you! Here is to ** years of being friends (you all know how long it has been, I won’t give away our ages!) and to many, many more! XOXOXOXO

Published in: on January 29, 2011 at 9:08 pm  Comments (1)  

ups and downs…

Today was one of those days! It started off busy and stayed that way through the majority of the day! Kinsy did not want to go to her toddler program today and had to be pried off of me, I was soon forgotten though when she got involved with the dollhouse and all the kids playing with it. Jack had his early development eval today and did fabulous! They said that he is right where he is supposed to be if not doing a little more! That was great news and I so relieved to hear it. Then dinner started and thrown in the crock pot, off to the commissary and the post office all before picking Kinsy up from daycare. That is when it started to go downhill….. she must have played hard today because she was CRANKY! Jack’s teeth really started to bother him and then I fell off a chair. Not only off a chair, but off a step stool on top of a chair. My dumb ass decided that would be a brilliant way to hang curtains and the chair, which has wheels, rolled out from underneath me! I did not fall all the way, but enough to make my left leg hurt and my lower back! After that I  just quit. That was the end of our day. Kinsy melted down about 5:30 and would not eat dinner and I refuse to make her something separate. I am sure she is going to be one very hungry girl in the morning! It is now 8pm, Kinsy is asleep in her room, Jack asleep on Branden’s chest. I am considering a bath to help my very sore muscles and then we are going to end this day and hope for a better on tomorrow.

Published in: on January 27, 2011 at 7:10 pm  Leave a Comment  

ghost stories….

I have been reading a lot of stories today of people who are having very strange things happening to them in their houses here in Baumholder. I for one believe them. I have had stuff happen here also that is unexplainable and Kinsy has seen things that I can not just push away to her imagination.  This military post has been around for many, many years. Hitler first opened this post. There are tunnels that run under the base from one side to the other and under the town of Baumholder. I have heard that during WWII POW’s were kept here. There are still swastika’s in the bricks on some of the buildings here. I believe that Poland’s and France’s militaries were also at this post at different times before the Americans moved in. I saw a picture of the building I currently live in, it was dated in the 1970’s I believe it said. The funny thing with that is it currently looks EXACTLY the same! The only differences was the model of cars out front and the size of the tree in the front! I believe that this post has sooo much history how could we not think that there were ghosts here? I am sure there have been some very historical as well as very tragic things that have happened here. I think it is time for me to start doing a little more research about my local area. So they question I will leave you with is… do you believe in ghosts? Do you believe, in a place with as much history as here, can have ghosts that still walk our halls and occupy our homes? These questions are enough to keep me up some nights!

Published in: on January 25, 2011 at 9:57 pm  Leave a Comment  

my girl… the future photographer!

So Kinsy got a hold of my camera and was very excited when I let her at it and did not take it away. I will admit I was a little curious what she was going to do with it! So now a warning of a few pictures taken by my 3 yr old. I am intrigued by her pictures. I wonder why she chose the things she did to take pictures of. Of course she has taken pictures of me and her dad and brother. But it is the pictures of the things you wouldn’t think of that interest me. Maybe she has a talent that needs to be developed, or maybe I am just momma and I am going to thing anything she does is great! So here is a preview of Kinsy’s portfolio! 🙂

 (from top to bottom) Kinsy’s feet, Branden, my toes, Kinsy’s feet with her book,

Jack’s feet, our tv, blocks and socks, my keyboard with me typing, cereal bowl,

Sippy cup and living room curtains. (Kinsy must have something with taking pics

of all of our feet!)

Published in: on January 22, 2011 at 9:28 pm  Comments (1)  

why do I buy toys?

Not sure why I spend the money on toys? Kinsy played for ever today with a plastic tub and her socks!

and one of Jack because he is cute and in the middle of a Kinsy toy mess!

Published in: on January 22, 2011 at 9:01 pm  Leave a Comment  

drama, drama, drama….

You know what I don’t understand is drama. I just do not see how anyone has time for it? There is a new facebook page fo the wives here in Baumholder. I loved this page when it first started! There was soooo much information right at my fingertips! If I didn’t know something or if I didn’t understand something  I could simply ask and someone would help me. I read through all the other posts and there was soo much I learned about our new town and about living the army life. But all of a sudden it seems like it is all just drama! I know you can not have almost 400 women on one page without some drama. It just doesn’t happen. But every post???? It is getting a little ridiculous and makes it so I do not even want to check out that page anymore. Which is sad because it could have been a great tool for all of us here. I know we are getting closer and closer to deployment and I know the stress levels are starting to increase so I hope that is the reason. But ladies… why take it out on each other? Are we not all on the same team? If we don’t have anything else in common we all know what it is like to let our loved ones go somewhere unknown for an unknown amount of time. We know what it is like to be somewhere where we know no one and have to make a new “family”.  That alone should bring us together! Especially being in Germany! Plus the majority of us have at least one child, I know my kids keep me too busy to worry much about what my neighbor is doing! I guess it isn’t limited to just the army life. It is everywhere you go. Why do we women have to treat each other this way? I know I was taught growing up, if you have nothing nice to say, don’t say anything at all. For the most part I do try to stick with that. Also I was taught to treat others as I would want to be treated. Wouldn’t life be so good if we all just followed those two simple rules?? I guess for now.. the only way to stay drama free is avoid the drama areas. I hope that once all the guys are shipped out that we wives here in Baumholder can start to be a little nicer to one another. We are supposed to be here to support one another….

Published in: on January 20, 2011 at 9:03 pm  Comments (2)  

last weekends project…..

Here is the project we completed last weekend for the kids room!

Can’t wait to get them hung up on their walls! Also made for some  great memories just sitting at the table with Branden painting, Kinsy sitting there coloring in her books and Jack sitting next to us in his high chair playing with his toys! It was a great family weekend!

Published in: on January 18, 2011 at 9:40 pm  Leave a Comment  

a momma’s love….

Today Kinsy gave me a glimpse of how I am doing as a momma. I was watching her play with her babies. She was setting them up and making them dinner. The babies started to “argue” about where they were sitting. McKinsy didn’t know I was watching her as she was helping her babies decide who would sit where and she was hugging them and kissing them and telling them that she loved them. Then I watched her make them hold hands and she played ring around the rosy with them. It was so cute! I realized while I was watching her though, the only way she would know how to play momma, is by watching her momma. And she was being so loving and gentle. There are some days that I feel that Kinsy and I are just clashing. I worry about when she becomes a teenager, I am afraid that we will not get along very well. Somedays I worry about how I interact with my kids and how they will remember growing up. I am sure every mom does. I hope I play with them enough, I hope I not only talk to them and teach them, but that they can also talk to me and teach me. I want them to always have hugs and kisses, when they grow up I want them to be able to say that they were always told how much they were loved, how much we hugged and kissed and cuddled. I want them to be told not only how cute they are, but also how smart they are. Today when I was watching Kinsy she gave me the pat on the back that I occasionally need!

Published in: on January 18, 2011 at 9:25 pm  Comments (2)  

too funny to not post!

Kinsy: Momma.. a bee!!!!

me: a bee? like a flying bee?

Kinsy: yes!! a bee!!

me: where is there a bee? (we are sitting in the living room)

Kinsy: in my room!

me: there is a bee in your room? well I am sure it is ok.

Kinsy: Momma, do you see the fire truck?

me: where do you see a fire truck?

Kinsy: in my room!

me: There is a fire truck in your room??

Kinsy: yes!!

me: so there is a bee and a fire truck in your room?

Kinsy: yes!!

me: Kinsy are you telling me stories?

Kinsy: yes momma! and she turns and walks away

me: with a wtf look on my face!!!!!

2nd one today – I am sitting on the couch and Kinsy comes to me crying…. I ask her what is wrong… she tells me through her tears that Daddy kicked her crack as she is pointing to her butt!

Branden comes in the room and I ask him why he kicked her crack, lol…. apparently she sat on his foot and he pulled his foot out quickly. And that, per Kinsy, is how you kick someones crack!

Published in: on January 13, 2011 at 8:14 pm  Comments (2)